| |
| Paranormal
entertainer John Edwards "saw" that there was money
to be made in the occult. |
|
This Is Para-Abnormal
OVER THE AIRWAVES-- It's
a feel-good story too good to be true. Or is it? Bruce Gotit has discovered
his hidden psychic powers and he wants to share them with the rest of
the (cable) world. Bruce has turned his talent of channel-surfing into
the paranormal art of channelling, and he hopes to use these newly-awakened
God-given talents to help mankind--hopefully on a popular television network,
like his idol, John Edwards, a man with exceptional psychic acumen. "I
see a spirit. He's telling me that his name sounds like Gord, or Tom,
or Bruce, or Mickey. At least I'm sure it starts with an S or a G, or
an R. Or a woman maybe... named Carla? Or Darla, Darlene, Charlene, Pauleen,
Paula, Polly, Molly, Mildred, Hilda, Helga, Helen, Ellen?"
Bruce became
interested in the supernatural watching paranormal entertainment shows
like Crossing Over, The X-Files, and Seinfeld.
He always knew he had a gift, a raw unbridled mental talent, but assumed
it was limited to being pretty good at 'Twenty Questions.' Only after
watching an episode of Highway to Heaven did he realize he could
see into the unknown simply by asking several hundred random questions.
"I'm
listening to a spirit. He's telling me you're having problems...your wife
or girlfriend, someone close to you... or maybe far away... something
about money..or infidelity...maybe it's job-related or about that new
television or cd player or Dirt Devil you bought... or sold... a tricky
situation... am I close?"
Bruce is
hoping, no, he has seen, that by having his own TV show he could,
will, help people with personal, financial and ethical problems.
"I
see a spirit. He's telling me you're calling because you have a question
you don't know the answer to... you're hurt inside... or confused... you
need an answer... or something... you need help, my help. I can help you,
using the supernatural powers that I have. This spirit is mumbling something
about an unfulfilled promise, or about leaving the lights on in the garage?
Oh, you live in an apartment? Yes, I see an apartment now...quite clearly
in fact. It's got two or three bedrooms...or perhaps it's only one bedroom
with a den... there's definitely a bathroom."
Bruce sees
himself as a new-age Johnny Smith (The Dead Zone). Only in his
visions, he gets more women than either Christopher Walken or Anthony
Michael Hall.
"It's
clear to me. I see myself two...maybe three years from now... I'm driving
a Lexus... no, two Lexus's... or is it Lexii? The blonde in the passenger
seat is changing the music, something more romantic... something that
allows the car to hug the pavement as it follows the winding road, leaves
swirling from the trees..."
Bruce definitely
has a vision. It includes syndication, a book offer, and a movie deal.
"I'm
talking to another spirit. He's telling me that I will soon have my own
show... a one-hour show... on a major network... in prime-time... and
with a huge contract...for five...no, six million dollars... per episode...yes." |